A woman is criticized for hiding a ‘cruel’ secret from her best friend for years, but she fears there is no polite way to tell him the truth without ruining their friendship.
The two twenty-year-olds have been friends for five years and the man has suffered from a ‘body odor problem’ all that time.
‘I’m not exaggerating when I say it’s a VERY bad smell. I’m not trying to be rude or funny, it’s really unbearable,” the woman revealed on Reddit.
She has often thought about raising the issue, but her friend’s mental health issues have made her hesitate.
‘He suffers from severe depression. I’m terrified of telling him he stinks and he considers that his last straw.
‘We are close and I cherish our friendship very much. I love him, so I want him to do well, and this would be the first step to getting better.”
But because of her gender, she is afraid of overstepping her boundaries.
‘As a woman, I don’t think it’s appropriate to talk about a man’s body odor. I feel like that’s a brother’s job.”
A woman is being criticized for hiding a ‘cruel’ secret from her best friend for years
She added: ‘The only other people in our friend group are also women, so we’re all in this awkward position. He has no other friends.’
She also said her boyfriend is seeking professional help for his depression and has been doing better in recent months.
Many people criticized her for keeping quiet about her friend’s body odor.
“If you smell it, everyone does, and eventually someone will tell him in a way that hurts him. You have the power to tell him in a way that someone really cares about him, and maybe you can help him do that,” one person said.
“If I was known as someone who stinks and the people closest to me didn’t say anything, I would feel so betrayed,” one man shared. “Five years is a long time.”
‘You have to do it. It doesn’t matter if you’re a woman, you’re a friend,” a third added.
“Just like I’d want my friends to tell me if there was something stuck in my teeth, I’d want to know if I smelled,” wrote another.
“It’s not your responsibility, but are you okay with knowing you’re not the only one who thinks this way, while your friend has no idea?”
But some said the situation was nuanced.
‘This is a very sensitive subject and the call could cause them to withdraw and back away more. They’re getting help and if it works, things like hygiene should improve, but if not, I think a few subtle hints wouldn’t hurt,” one person said.
