Celebrated Musician Wahu Kagwi has opened up about her deeply personal journey, marked by the heart-wrenching experience of enduring two miscarriages.
As seen on her Instagram stories on Friday, July 19, 2024, Wahu recounted the pain she endured during those two deafening years, revealing how doctors suggested options like IVF, yet the thought of facing another loss left her unable to continue trying.
“I had had 2 miscarriages in the last couple of years after really trying to get pregnant. Let me tell you….the pain,” Wahu remarked.
“It was unbearable… so much heartache… doctors had told me I could still try again, maybe explore IVF and other alternatives, but there still was no guarantee that the pregnancy would “hold” … there’s never a guarantee.”
According to Wahu, the weight of potential loss became too heavy to bear, leading her to relinquish the pursuit of expanding her family.
“I couldn’t bear the thought of trying again, and then losing yet another pregnancy. So as much as I still wanted 3rd child, I gave up trying and said if God wanted to give me a baby, He would…1 year went by..2…3…nothing,” Wahu stated.
Change of perspective
Further, Wahu candidly expressed how the sight of women embarking on their third pregnancies served as a poignant trigger, magnifying her own sense of loss and unfulfilled longing for a third child. However, a pivotal moment in January 2022 marked a profound shift in her perspective.
“Towards the end of 2021, I remember thinking..” give up the dream”…but anytime I saw a lady pregnant with her 3rd child…not 1st, or 2nd, or 4th…just 3rd…it was such a trigger for me… But I couldn’t keep feeling like this..so in January of 2022, one night…around midnight, I decided to exchange the pain for gratitude…I thanked God for the 2 children he had blessed me with,” she noted.
In a moment of reflection, Wahu chose to focus on her two daughters and chose to exchange her anguish for gratitude. She adds that she embarked on a transformative journey towards acceptance and appreciation for the blessings already present in her life.
Seeking professional help
In addition, Wahu revealed that the arrival of her youngest daughter, Shiru, brought a whirlwind of emotions that Wahu describes as a roller-coaster ride.
“Anyway, I was anxious my entire pregnancy with Shi. I was extremely excited, yet worried that something would happen…I couldn’t believe that God had just decided to hook me up …just like that??Is this what they call imposter syndrome? And that is why I was anxious about announcing publicly…” What if I did, and something happened?” she posed
Reflecting on her experience, Wahu emphasized the importance of seeking counselling support during such challenging times.
Wahu further advised those grappling with the pain of child loss to seek solace and guidance from professional counsellors to navigate the emotions and complexities that accompany such profound loss.
“With the benefit of hindsight, I really should have gone for counselling, and I strongly advise anyone who’s ever suffered child loss to see a counsellor.”